Neil Kendall

Aug. 19, 1936 - Sept. 23, 2024

NEIL FOREST KENDALL Neil Forrest Kendall was born August 19, 1936 in Lakewood, Ohio. He passed away on September 23, 2024 in Lynnwood, Washington. Neil was a kind, witty, generous man. From a young age, he devoted himself to family; first his mother and his brothers, and then the great love of his life, Mildred Anne (M.A.) Schmidtman Kendall. Neil and M.A. were married for 66 years, and their relationship was built on love, consistency, and integrity. Neil was our dad, our father-in-law, our grandfather, our brother, our brother-in-law, our uncle, our Poppa and our friend. He always saw the best in others and was endlessly inquisitive about the world. Neil leaves behind his daughter Katherine Anne (Kendall) Kirkpatrick of Garden City, Idaho; his son Bruce William Kendall and his wife Sara Schreiner Kendall of University Place, Washington; his daughter-in-law, Dori Shoji of Seattle, Washington; his grandchildren: including Patrick Kendall and his wife Margaux Faris Kendall; Jackson Kendall and his wife Victoria (Tory) Stolper; Casey Kendall and his wife Emily Xu Hall; Kendall Anne Kirkpatrick; and Caroline Kirkpatrick; and his great-granddaughter Madelyn Kendall. He also leaves behind his brother Russell Kendall of Winchester, Virginia and his wife Linda Kendall; his brother Owen Kendall of Lakewood, Ohio; and numerous nieces and nephews. Neil was preceded in death by his beloved wife, M.A. Kendall, who died seven days before his passing (see adjacent obituary). Neil was also preceded in death by his son Stephen (Steve) Kendall; his son-in-law Dana Kirkpatrick; his brother Darryl Kendall; his sister in-law Virginia Kendall; his sister-in-law Marylou Kendall; and his cousin Roger Konrad. Neil was the son of Helen Gorman Kendall and William Calvin Kendall. He was the oldest of four brothers. Along with his mother he was a guiding light for the other boys, Darryl, Russell, and Owen. He grew up in Lakewood, Ohio, much of it on Brockley Avenue. After his father lost his business during the Depression, then was injured while working construction, his mother went to work full time as a nurse. Neil never forgot Helen’s drive to ensure that the family stayed together and had food on the table. As the oldest, Neil devoted himself to his education and worked various jobs to help support the family, offering a model for his younger brothers. He was elected senior class president at Lakewood High School (1954) and made friends he kept for a lifetime. During junior year a new girl arrived at LHS and joined his class. She may even have voted for him, but they never socialized. Little did he know. With finances tight, Neil anticipated staying close to home after high school. On a dare, he took the exam for entrance to the U.S. Coast Guard Academy in New London, CT. Once accepted, Neil jumped at the chance to become a cadet and then a commissioned officer. Neil spoke often of his great appreciation for Cilda L. Smith, the high school teacher who tutored students interested in military academies. He followed his Coast Guard path for 30 years with tremendous gratitude that the Coast Guard gave him a shot. While at the academy Neil had the chance to get to know that new girl from back in high school. M.A. was attending neighboring Connecticut College and in true 1950s fashion there were many organized dances and mixers between the two schools. They fell in love, became engaged, and were married in the academy chapel soon after graduation. The Coast Guard had Neil and M.A. on the move for the next 30 years. Their marriage odyssey took them from New London (CT) to Port Angeles (WA), Athens (GA), Ketchikan (AK), back to Port Angeles, Rockville (MD), Bellevue (WA), Oxon Hill (MD), Governors Island (NY), Washington DC, Groton (CT), and Marysville (WA). With arrival of babies Steve, Bruce, and Katie in the first six years, Neil and M.A. ensured that family came first. Neil felt fortunate that he was stationed away from the family for an extended period just once, on the island of Iwo Jima (1961-1962). He ran the Loran Station (Long Range Navigation) which provided accurate location information to ships in the Pacific Ocean (pre GPS). He had great reverence for the soldiers who had perished on the island just 15 years before during WWII. During his early career Neil served aboard numerous Coast Guard ships. His favorite was the Winona, a 254 foot cutter, where he was the executive officer. His kids thrilled at meeting the ship when it returned to port so they could hear stories of his missions to interdict illegal fishing vessels in Alaska or come to the aid of freighters adrift at sea. (Yes, his young children knew what ‘interdict’ meant.) Best of all were family meals on board ship in the officers’ wardroom and learning to play the aptly named card game, Dirty Ernie. Neil’s forte with numbers led him into finance, including two tours in Washington, DC working for the Coast Guard’s office of the comptroller. He took this work seriously as his office was responsible for managing Congressional appropriations and ensuring that the 74,000 people serving in the Coast Guard were paid on time. At home, Neil was an avid vegetable gardener, producing enormous squash and delicious tomatoes. A quiet man by nature, Neil gave free rein to his kids at the dinner table as they shared their daily exploits and ribbed one another (aka argued). He was adept at wry remarks, corny jokes, and well-timed non-sequiturs. Each year he had the kids and grandkids howling with laughter at his theatrical reading of the Night Before Christmas. On his off days, Neil enjoyed home repair jobs, walking the dog, bartending, and unusually for that era, he took on domestic chores, including vacuuming. As the family moved across the country several times in the 70s and 80s everyone enjoyed the fun of travel on a budget, including tent camping, Coleman sleeping bags and stove, inflatable mattresses, and the occasional roadside motel with a sketchy outdoor pool. Two adults, two tall boys, a girl, and Casper the family dog, in a two-door Plymouth Fury III without air conditioning made for some great memories. Campsite breakfasts where M.A. whipped up pancakes and bacon made these family trips magical. As the family ventured into the unknown to the next homebase the kids trusted Neil and M.A. knew what they were doing. All would be well. Comic relief came in many forms, most memorably the time Neil (who was tone deaf) was randomly selected from an audience of hundreds to sing with a banjo band on stage at Lake of Ozarks. Neil volunteered to coach his kids’ sports teams, help their scout troops, and take them car camping. He taught everyone to ride a bike, mow the lawn, and drive a car. He also taught his offspring the true meaning of respect for other people. He did this by actions more than words. He rarely raised his voice and always listened attentively to the opinions of others. He made friends easily and for life. He treated everyone in public encounters across the country and across socio-economic groups with respect and a twinkling light in his eyes. He was the guy who would help the waiter when they dropped the tray. Neil retired from the Coast Guard in 1988 in Groton (CT). While his accomplishments did not make many headlines, they had tremendous impact on the Coast Guard and his community. Neil stayed involved in Coast Guard alumni affairs for the rest of his life. Service to others was at his core. After leaving the Coast Guard, Neil and M.A. moved to Marysville (WA) to begin a new chapter. Soon, Neil began pursuing his next calling. Inspired by his mother’s career in nursing and his own values, he enrolled in the nursing program at Everett Community College. His class photo shows 54-year-old Neil along with two dozen other graduates, all at least 20 years his junior. Neil took his new skills to help those most in need, often people in low income nursing homes in Snohomish County. His only requirement was that he not become anyone’s boss. He insisted on working directly with residents on their most basic needs. Later in retirement Neil provided another service – as a volunteer tax preparation specialist through AARP. He coordinated a county-wide crew of volunteers, including programing their laptops for them. Neil’s rare capacity to find fun and satisfaction in helping retirees navigate the IRS surprised many people, but made perfect sense to his family. Neil was known as Poppa to his five grandchildren and one great-grandchild. The older kids also loved to call him “The Captain”. They urged him to tell stories of his time on Iwo Jima, how he fell in love with Gamma, and what it was like training as a young cadet on the Eagle, the three masted barque stationed at the Academy. While in college, Neil and his classmates sailed the Eagle across the Atlantic Ocean gaining invaluable navigation and teamwork experience. Neil and M.A. moved into the Quail Park retirement community in Lynnwood earlier this year. Five years ago, Neil suffered a stroke and had been in slow decline since. His mind was sharp, but his speech had slowed, and his balance was compromised. He was happiest being with M.A. and they quickly embraced the support he received at their new home. M.A. fell ill and passed away on September 16th. Neil passed one week later. Neil was an original. His life with M.A. was full and complete. He was a true and equal partner. They were ahead of their time; a beautiful example of a loving, supportive partnership, and an inspiration to their children and grandchildren. A Celebration of Life for Neil and M.A. will be held in early 2025. In lieu of flowers, please make a gift to Coast Guard Mutual Assistance or OxFam.